Nexte – Le Monde à L’Envers

Nexte – Le Monde à L’Envers

August 28, 2019 30 By William Hollis


Hi everybody, I’m Sidney. I’m 18 years old and 5’4″ fatal beauty I’m here looking for a guy, preferably handsome and muscular, with a big d*** And above all I would like him to carry my bag, because for me it is too heavy, there is too much make-up I’m a rap star, tmtc insha’Allah, so if you don’t like it when guys look at my ass, then you can get back on the bus, because it’ll be “next”! I don’t like jealous people! [Voice-over] And these are the suitors: Hi, I’m Leonard, I like football and balls, but especially beautiful chicks’ balls! Hi, I’m Killian. and I’m 23. I’m a stud but today I’m not gonna bring down I’ll take you to 7th heaven! What’s up is Franci, and as everyone says: “Once I smile, all the chicks end up in my bed!” Hey everyone, I’m Vincent but you can call me Vince if you want, plus I’m so stylish I’ve already fucked my sister! Han han ! Hi, I’m Harry, and I don’t think I’m Harry Potter, because my wand is much bigger than his. if you know what I mean ! [Voice-over] On the bus, the boys can’t hold their seats anymore. They’re in heat. [Leonard] You, I’m ken te! You, you, I’ll get you! After I ken me, after I ken you all wh*re ! All of them! *awkward silence* *awkward silence* [Voice-over] They can’t wait to meet Sidney! [Franci] Okay, guys, I’m first. Anyway, you won’t have to get up since she’s gonna pick me! ooooooohhhh ! tac tac tac tac tac tac tac-tac-tac-tacc *music* [Voice-over]
Franci is 20 years old. He dreams of being American, he’s already thrown up on one of his exes. and he stayed with his parents for a year and a half! [Sidney] NEXT ! Too bad you nexed me, Sidney. I brought you a present. Man, even from a distance, I saw you were a virgin! Then, frankly, go back to your mother because I’m not your nanny! [Voice-over] Hard blow for Franci who leaves without girlfriend and without money. Now it’s Harry’s turn to meet Sidney. *music* Harry’s 25, he’s already eaten human meat. he collects tampons from his exes, and he has pubic hair phobia. Will Harry please Sidney? Or will he get thrown out in seconds like Franci ? I’m Harry. Harry. That’s my name, that’s what I call myself, that’s…. All right, shut the fuck up! I get it: your name is Henry! And what do you do for a living? I’m a mechanic, actually. I fix big cars. I have them… in my hands. *scuttle* Oh yeah too stylish too cool your job NEXT ! Go on, you ugly bitch. You’re so wrong that even my inflatable doll next to you looks more real. You’re a mechanic! Well, go back to work with your cars because you won’t touch my body. Harry’s so upset he won’t even get back on the bus. I’m going ken it! What am I going ken with? Well with my di** with my big didi** She thinks what there she’s going to end up where in her mouth in her mouth and in her pussy. Killian is 23 years old and has already had sex in a kindergarten. he walks his snake on a leash in the street And he loves dog food. Will he do better than the other boys? Hi, I’m Sidney My name is Killian Enchanted Princess all the same Wow Ok uh , okay Uh, what do you do for a living? Well, right now I’m in training. Uh, I’m getting my driver’s license to be a truck driver. Oh, yeah, with trucks and all, I love trucks. Well, then go ahead and say poo-poo. Truck ! Oh yeah, okay, you’re like the fast guy, you’re fast and furious. Okay, well, I like people who take initiative. So I say we do the dance together. You know Zouk? Of course, my grandfather is Kabyle. Yeah, okay, he’s stupid. Well, it’s not as much my fault. Uh, so we’ll dance the Zouc, we can get in position if you want. [Voice-over] time passes and Sidney seems to like Killian frankly you’re doing pretty well, so I’m gonna ask you to choose between: either the bra or the panties. You have to tell me which one you’d take from a girl first. uh without hesitation I choose sensuality Okay, go ahead. You can put it on. … uh… really about me? [Voice-over] Well, then, Killian, what’s the matter, we don’t like Sydney’s taste? [Sydney] Let’s see around Wow, you’re pretty good-looking. You know what ? I’ll tell you NEXT! Get out of here! That’s you heych, you next! You can go, thanks. Yeah, well, you know what, stay here, stay here. Stay right here ! Hey you know what, actually it looks good on me warrior, I can put guns! I can put guns here ! Hey sydney ! you know what, man, I don’t make love to poofs. Hey, I’m sitting in it! Hey Kilian, you spit on me too much with your lisp. Limit I’m wetter than if you wanted to excite me [Voice-over]
Kilian didn’t get a chance to go any further with Sydney. Is Leonard going to make it? [Leonard] You want me to go?! [Kilian] (incomprehensible) [Leonard] You want me to go??!! [The others] Yeah… [Leonard] IS THAT YOU WANT THAT I GO THEREEEE !!!!!!! [Voice-over]
Leonard is 21 years old, he has already participated in a farts contest, he can snap his testicles, he hates gulls. [Leonard] Hello Leonard [Sydney] So I’m not Leonard, I’m Sydney. No no no, my name is Leonard. You know what, you shut the fuck up, we’re not here to do this. So please tell me what you do for a living. Me i’m uh… I’m a mathemati…, I’m a fireman. Oh yeah, like fireman with your, uh… flashing lights. Flashing lights What happens to save people in trees But I’m also a singer in my spare time, madam. Ah, well, you’re a singer. Hey, can you sing me a little song? *Howl* Oua oua oua oua ouaaaaaa *Howl* Oua oua oua oua ouaaaaaa [Sydney] You know what, since you sing like shit. you’re gonna have to catch yourself so you’re gonna do 50 push-ups 50 pumps, please, madam. [Voice-over] Meanwhile the boys are talking. [Vincent] Hey rum life, I fucked 500 chicks! [Kilian] Hey you know what I fucked over 1,000 chicks brother! Hey you’re a mytho I fucked 2200 because I forgot to to count the vacation ones! Plus I fucked my sister! I just remembered, well, I fucked 3,000 chicks. and inside she doesn’t even know I fucked them. [Voice-over] 20 minutes later, Leonard finally finished doing his push-ups. Well, listen, congratulations, but I’ll tell you NEXT! Why do you say next ? You know what? I don’t care if you say next. Because I have to deserve me, madam. That’s it! That’s it! Talk to my breasts my head is sick! Wesh Sydney, this is not where you should be. This is the circus. with your clown makeup Hey, Leonard, you’re gonna have to go back to the gym, cause you didn’t even do 50 push-ups. you were already out of breath, what’s it gonna be like when we get laid? [Voice-over] It’s Vince’s turn to seduce Sydney. Vince is 24, he’s killed someone before, often confused with Bob Marley. and he’s already been abducted by aliens. Vince is our last suitor, will he succeed in seducing our beautiful Sydney? Enchanted , Me i’m Sydney Enchanted , Me is Vince hein hein. Nice to meet you. Pleased too Well listen, you know what I’m all confused, like I don’t know what’s happening to me. I think I’m, like, too in love with you or something. Oh yeah ? I don’t know why, but I think you’re too handsome. Yeah, I admit I’m handsome, yeah. So here’s the deal. is for us to go on a little picnic Okay, cool, though, do you want to sting or fuck first? [Vince] *Laughter stupid* No, picnic is when you eat things. Oh, no, but I’m kidding. It’s a joke, right? Ah it was a joke, you’re actually funny, you’re funny. I love funny, funny, clowns. [Voice-over] Time passes slowly So what do you do for a living? Well, I’m a rapper. Are you serious? Are you a rapper? But I’m a rapper too. Serious ? Yeah, what kind of rap do you do? Ah I’m doing my own rap, you want me to play you a piece? Yeah, go ahead, I’m listening. Okay, but it will be acappela. [Voice-over] Vince gets his voice warmed up and starts. OOOO WABALEDAWALO MALO WAGUE BALAMEGAGUE SOISAU BALOUKITIKA BALOUKITIKA OUN DA OUN DA KOULAKAKA O-O-O-O-OOOOOOO-O-O-O-O-O-O BALOUNCHA BALOUNCHA BALIKITIKA BALIKITIKA BOOMSHAKA BOOMSHAKA BOOMSHAKA GA BA DA DE DA WAEEEEEE WOOOOO ! Hey, frankly, I love it when you sing. Oh yeah ? Frankly, I love how you’re getting smaller and I’m your first fan, actually. First at all your concerts. Oh cool hein. Well, listen, I don’t know if you feel the same atmosphere between us. But I think it’s going well so I’m going to propose a new activity, you’re gonna have to eat something special. Okay no problem Is that chocolate? No, it’s not chocolate. It’s my sh*t Okay cool… Yeah, but don’t worry, it’s clean, and I made it myself. She’s clean this morning. [Voice-over] Vince decides to go for it, he’d do anything to seduce Sydney. Oh it’s it’s hot ! Frankly, bravo because I wouldn’t have done it like it’s too gross. But at least it proves that you care about me, that you want to go out with me, and then we can move on to the next trial. Vince comes back a few minutes later in a giant penis suit. He’s got too much swag. [Sydney] Woah you’re too handsome like that! I swear to you! Since for the rules of the game, you’ll just have to pass between all the trees that are there. and after you come back to me. And once you get back, you’re gonna have to pass between my legs. Because my legs actually represent my pussy, you represent the penis and it’s as if you’ve penetrated me. Then maybe you’ll have the right to penetrate me in person. [Voice-over] Meanwhile, on the bus: And the budget that is allocated to the Paris airports why it is not allocated to the… To to to social assistance Absolutely! And at the p*tain museums, there’s a museum on Spinoza that’s coming out soon. why don’t we allocate! Where are our taxes going?! [Voice-over] Go go! [Sydney] Come on, Vince! Let’s go, let’s go! You must pass between as many trees as possible! The more trees you pass, the wetter I get! The more excited I get! I’ll wait for you right here! Come on, Vince! Come on Vince ! Come on Vince ! Come on ! Come on ! Come on ! I wait you sh*t It’s okay, you still have time, you can still pass! Come on, you’re between my pussy! Come on ! Come on ! WOOOOO ! Good job baby ! [Voice-over] Looks like our two lovebirds are on the same page. Well, there’s Vince. We’ve been together 40 minutes. So I’m gonna have to let you choose. Either stay with me for a second date or go back to the bus with 40€. [Voice-over] Will Vince leave with the money, or will he choose Sydney, his beloved? Frankly, Sydney, I’m gonna be honest with you. The first time I saw you, I thought you were a traveler. But I’m gonna say no to the agent because I like you. Okay for a second date! Serious ?! Yeah ! Serious ? Come here. [Voice-over] This time it’s safe and certain, it looks like Sydney found a shoe to her foot. [All] Sydney! You picked Vince, all the better! We don’t like plastic, brainless barbies! Byeee ! [Voice-over] Our two lovers are going hand in hand. Of course, we wish them all the happiness in the world. *Outro music* [Leonard] Use louder go! That’s good, that’s good. [Vince] *Wailing* [Leonard] Yeah, there you go. Excuse me! Excuse me ! Does it bother you what we do or not? (English subtitle by Halbatord)